W.W.K.L.D: Being a skinny bitch, please.

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I will be in a wedding at the end of the year, and I am still working on this post quiting smoking weight. Which is totally boring, but true. And the probs with this wedding is that the rest of the bridal party is like totally babe-worthy, and I am currently chubby. Dilemma.

So I have been exercising my face off, trying not to drinking brown booze (whisky, beer etc. etc.), working on riding to work every day etc. But you know, I am kind of lazy with this weightloss effort, so I constantly try and find some quick routes that will make it all that little bit easier.. Here are some of the best that I found – while trolling the web/ asking the greater questions in life:

  1. Drink Green Tea, apparently it speeds up your metabolism.. Now look, ok – I get it, it’s probably good for you, but if you drink green tea – it is probably all the water going through your system, flushing out all the bad – not necessarily the green tea – right?
  2. Eat a big breakfast… Not to be a total downer on this – and I’m probably wrong, but if I eat a big breakfast, I want a bigger lunch. Oh what’s that about dinner.. yeah I want a bigger one of those too.. So you see – this big breakfast thing – doesn’t work (for me). If you have ever been to America, you might notice – the portion sizes are never moderate. Let’s not super size, the land of super sizing..
  3. Eating fruit is sugars. Sugar you should avoid.. Listen up people, if I want French fries – I’m gonna try and go for the fruit instead. So don’t you dare tell me I can’t eat a banana because there is too much sugar.. I will probably tell you, to go fuck yourself.

The one person that has given me real guidence and solid advice is Unkle Karl. God bless that man with his Euro sensibilities.. When coming to the end of my research, feeling defeated and marginally perplexed by the weight loss game, it was his solid, yet SIMPLE advice that is getting me through…

“The body has to be impeccable. If it’s not, buy small sizes and eat less food” ….Karl, you’re a GENIUS!

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About LUCY

Femme of sass, sometimes.