The beginner’s guide to Tinder


Recently I wrote an article for ├╝berlin on how to successfully navigate Tinder. Find that post over here or just read it now, below.

It’s Valentine’s Day and if you are anything like me, you are probably single (and loving it, don’t be so smug relationship people) but this time of the year is always a weird one. If you have any ounce of doubt in your singledom, you’ll probably find yourself slightly depressed – don’t. The answer is simple: Get on Tinder.

Personally, I find Tinder to be a wholly gross experience however in times of lonely and self doubt it is one of the most magical applications that has graced my second swipe iPhone screen. Here are a few tips on how to best get started on Tinder, and hopefully this Valentine’s day – you won’t be so lonely.

A QUICK GAME IS A GOOD GAME – Deliberating over Tinder is a waste of energy. It’s really not tricky, nor should it consume too much of your brain capacity – you right or you left swipe. You don’t diagonal, you don’t half, you don’t save for later. It’s a yes or no thing. It’s pretty shallow – but that’s life on Tinder. Keep it moving.

TRAVEL AND TINDER – Don’t stick around in your area. BUH – that’s the worst. Soon enough the dudes/ femmes dry up and you are left with Tinder giving you matches well out of your predetermined perimeters. Are you headed to Pretzel Berg? Tinder. Picking something up from Charlottenburg off Kleinanzeigen – Tinder. Ideally you wouldn’t have to travel but I think the “rules” you make for distance etc. is all a bit not working. Really you get better results when you make it out to new/ exciting locations.

FACEBOOK LIKE THINGS – The way in which you assess if you do or don’t like someone is through your interests, mutual friends and distance (more or less). So if you haven’t liked pages on Facebook since 2007 – you should probably get in there and start giving some thumbs. It’ll give you a better sense of the talent, and maybe Facebook will become a more interesting place. Here, start with my page – it’s awesome.

REMEMBER IT’S NOT FOREVER – This isn’t marriage, it’s tinder. So at the very most it’s a night of loose living and at the very least? A coffee at 2P on a Tuesday. This is taking us right back to point one, don’t over think this. There is no commitment, there are no guarantees – so don’t get into it too deeply. Maybe the really hot guy/ femme you right swiped is a dope in written word, but maybe the “hmm OK maybe I should have left swiped based on looks” person is witty as fuck and you are all – I COULD DATE YOU. You would have missed something. #YOLO, #FOMO, all those abbreviations work here.

KEEP AN OPEN MIND – Not everyone is totally photogenic nor understands their angles, so try and stay relatively open minded. I mean, have you seen a German persons CV – this serious vibed photo is bananas. I mean – firstly a photo on a CV is fucked – but secondly smile? Look like life isn’t too much to bare. This cultural aspect of the place in which we all live really made me soften on my standards when it comes to the photos.

SPONTANEITY IS KEY – Be spontaneous. Don’t sit there asking stupid questions via a messaging function. Go out for drinks – immediately. The whole “So – where are you from? Australia cool, me too. How long have you lived here? Oh wow. 4 years, that’s ages” YAWN – I am so bored typing that right now, and it’s not even a real conversation. Winter is depressing enough, without having to participate in these dreary back and forth TYPED conversations with someone you really don’t know. TAKE IT IRL.


About LUCY

Femme of sass, sometimes.