To be fair – this isn’t very much less than what I am now – but it is enough to drive me to drink; which is entirely counter-productive, because do you even know how many calories there are in booze – like so many.
As a result of my (seemingly) ON GOING quest to be a skinny bitch please, I have taken to eating salads for lunch. I hate salads. I don’t even care what LC from the hills says – they are driving me mental.
Right now I am eating a salad with salmon, and I am literally having to remind myself that once I am full I will have forgotten how much I hate eating this. Coaching oneself through lunch is NOT OK, that is never ok.
The other thing about this whole salad mentality is that it starts to control you even when you are trying to let go, and just say – eat something fucking delicious.. Like a burger. Eff you waitress for asking me if I want “fries or salad with that” I KNOW there is the option to take salad, I totally get it.
If I wanted the salad, I would have asked for it – it is not the 1940’s where women should be admired not heard, it’s 2011 – I will let you know. However, now you have guilted me into a salad instead of fries and by default you have made my meal 25% less enjoyable.
Frankly – I just want to take smoking back up. That was way easy > rather than this shit show which is salads and spin class. But quitting was kind of like the hardest thing I have ever done on the planet earth – and I don’t ever want to go through that nightmare..