Wanting things you can’t have – makes me want to stab someone.
And it’s on the daily at the moment. So, I am going through major major manic, and it needs to go away – right now. I have been trying to think of ways to solve this, and all I can think of is exercise – because then I am so exhausted I can’t feel manic anymore.
I think I need a distraction, like a proper emotional distraction – options are:
- find a short term boyfriend
- find a short term fling (likely more fun than above boyfriend option – but with manic comes needy – so anticipate it will morph into the above)
- buy new clothes (momentary distraction – but long term results of feeling good in my new clothes)
And that is actually all I have – needs to be emotional distraction (clothes = emotional, yes – seriously) – because my manic is totally rooted in emotional shit. Now, let’s not get too excited – I am in no way depressed, I just feel manic which is sort of the same as feeling anxious. I feel anxious, and what that feels like to me is like butterflies in my stomach for no reason – and wanting something to happen but not knowing what. It’s uber frustrating.
It makes me want to eat my feelings
