It’s Valentines day – and you should all enjoy it.


This isn’t a suggestion – it’s command. If Hallmark is going to make a global “holiday” about love – you should love someone. Commercial values rule, do as you are told.

It’s actually not hard – I don’t get why people feel so goddamn sorry for themselves on Valentines day – there are so many people to cherish/ adore on the daily.

  • Love that person who lives in your building who you have met like 17 times, for them to always forget you obnoxiously – because it reminds you, you are in fact a better than them on every level.
  • Love the call center arseholes at your health insurance for making it a 2h process to book an appointment with a doctor – because now you have a greater understanding of America’s ridiculous health care system – sort of.
  • Love your mum because she will probably send you flowers and sign it “anonymously” from Sean Connery – because that is who appeals to her, and “feels less like mum sent it – if I sign it from an ACTUAL person”.

Happy Valentines day – I love you, forever.


About LUCY

Femme of sass, sometimes.