{insert word here} Jesus.


So, I have funny friends. It’s just a fact. And I put that down to one of the reasons I am mildly hilarious, because of my funny mates. One semi new mate (Texan) and his house mate had this sort of killer idea, instead of actually honoring JC (Jesus) they have different brands of them. So there is a Music Jesus, Design Jesus, Cultural Jesus, American Jesus – and the list goes on.

It is kind of a genius notion really. I mean, I am somewhat anti Christ, well not completely anti Christ – but I believe in science, which sort of contradicts all that is holy. So having my very own Jesus, and lots of them, is pretty fucking brilliant.

So far I have 2 – as this title is sort if heavy, you need to pick wisely.

American Jesus – Oprah, because she is Oprah (obvs.)

Music Jesus – Beyonce, weird choice (I know) – but reason being, and in no way limited to:

  1. She married JayZ.
  2. Successfully broke from a girl group.
  3. Is a total babe, in a non anorexic way.
  4. Made an anthem for all the single ladies.

I think I like the idea of Jesus being completely devoid of depth. So I like both of my choices over say, something completely obvious like Obama for American Jesus or maybe MJ for our Music category (RIP).

So thank you funny friends – you entertain me the same way in which cigarettes did at the bus stop.

A much needed void to fill.


About LUCY

Femme of sass, sometimes.