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Cloth
So – this section is purely cloth related. I like a hot babe who dons the cloth? – they’ll be here. Some mental shoes grace the pages – filing under Cloth. I’m not a self proclaimed fashion whatever – but I will occasionally write about, or lust over something of the clothing variety. You like them threads – then sift through here.
I’ll tell you what is up.. Rad socks. This is not a brand, it is a movement for your feet. I believe gone are the days of white or black socks; get creative > add some flair to an otherwise boring outfit and wear sic socks.
I feel like the reason for doing this is that it’s a semi cheeky way of showing some style if you have to don a suit day in/ day out. But it is also a little surprise. This tip is for boys mostly. You see, girls notice things, we analyse EVERYTHING. SO – if we are chatting, and you cross you legs and I peek your socks, it’s going to make my heart flutter, just a little.
It could be what concentrating on your socks represents.. If you take the time to care about your socks, it really makes it feel like you have it under control. You are checking shit off. Life goal status, TICK! It represents having it together enough, to care for the details. Now – if you are only caring for the details and your life is actually a mess, this will show pretty quickly – and I will get over your ability to choose awesome socks. So, don’t use this as a fool tactic, girls aren’t retarded (some are, the ones you want to date probably aren’t) – we’ll figure out if you are trying to pull a fast one with the socks. For realz.
OK – so maybe I can’t explain the impact of cool socks, the above reason is semi rubbish really.. isn’t it? > but it does take you up in the stylish male scale – and frankly, a stylish male, makes most swoon.
Get babe-worthy; spend the cash, on the socks.
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Things I want right now, a cable knit sweater/ jumper.. I don’t have one, because I don’t actually think I look that good in jumpers.. and if I did have one – I think I would need a slim long shirt, and I don’t have one of those/ this combo would be one of those outfits I could only rock a few times, because you would notice..
But frankly – this is a MAJ’or win.. it’s effortlessly cool, and it makes me feel fashionably insuperior.. Is insuperior a word – I don’t even care, that is how I feel.
This + shirt with leather collar + shirt with studded collar + green parka + black leather, is all I want.. for now
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- J Crew t-shirt: I’m sorry – but there is nothing better than a guy in a plain tshirt.. it could be white, dark grey, light grey, black, navy – frankly – don’t give a shit. Just don’t have prints and keep it form fitting. Any brand will often do, but you will snag the best babes if it feels soft as a babies arse. So pay the money > shop at the Crew/ or for you AU’ers Nique does some pretty sick plains.
- Rayban sunglasses: Old but always delicious. I can’t stand a guy in rude sunnies – it kind of reminds me of festivals with neon t shirts and too much chewing gum. Get it together people, classic is what is up. The Clubmasters in tortoise from Raybans are firm favorites > and if you need to rude it up a bit, you can get them colored.. on the inside!
- (in the..) Navy shorts: So these look totally too short, but I almost think they are kind of a nice answer to swim trunks – maybe I’m weird. But if you aren’t enormous (built boys these are not for you, do you read me > don’t even think about it) then you could rock these sort of tight, with white t shirt, flip flops > whip your shirt off – go for a swim, it’s très cool, très facile, très babe.
- J Crew shirt: I am kind of loving a chambray shirt, and I am totally digging short sleeves this summer. Not that I am the oracle on all that is cool for the male species, but I seriously love these – I also sort of think you could dress up with a bow tie (another dress up obsession of mine) some skinny’ish jeans/ pants, high tops and you are away. Chambray shirt > get at it.
- J Crew shorts: These are rude, well – the color is rude. I am not sure how I feel about the rude color unless you are dark. If you are fair (like myself) then you need to go for navy. always above the knee, by about an inch – maybe 2, pending: your height/ weight ratio.
- Check shirt – weathered looking: A check shirt is just good to have, especially when weathered looking. Makes you look like you aren’t trying, but YOU ARE trying enough to look amaze. This one is J Crew – but frankly, you could get at a second hand store, just make sure it fits and doesn’t have holes. Dirty hipster is not ideal.
- Panama hat: The greatest male babes are always sun smart. No one wants to look like a weather hand bag at 60, even if that is all you are to your other half. So hat up. I personally love the Panama hat, because it folds up without losing it’s shape (if you spend good money on it) and it sort of feels Colombian drug lord’esque – with out the danger. YESYESYES.
- Hightops: Fuck pointy leather numbers, get the high-tops. I think guys can wear anything, if you rock enough confidence with the rest of your wear. I’m all about the fancy hightops with suits. Don a pair; even if it’s just with jeans – there is something designer chic about them. Will make you 75% more validated than what you were before.
- Book Bag: things in pockets is kind of shitty. Unless you have a parker or something and you can’t tell you have things in pockets.. Get me? No one wants to see lumpy keys one side, big wallet on the back side. The upside of a book bag is that maybe you will carry an actual book; guys that read = better than guys that don’t read. Flaunt your smarts, even if you are fibbing.
- Havianas: For the beach. Don’t get those hemp looking flip flops > they are not cool. Don’t try and style the flip flop > get the OG version. And move on.
- Vilebrequin Shorts: I sort of love rude shorts at the beach. But only at the beach. So these ones are the best. You can get ones from Vilebrequin that change color when hit by water, and there are heaps and heaps of styles/ colors > so… sort of amazing for matching all the moods.
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I think you will be able to get them at Mira Mira on 22nd Street in the Mission.. But I am sure you can also get online at funkis.
The fact of the matter is, if the Zanita Clogs don’t make you 75% more sassy, I don’t know what will.
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OK – right. This may or may not be a rant, I can’t quite work it out yet. But it has started that way in my head. We are coming into summer – now in SF this is non-existent, but this year for my birthday I will have 10 glorious days (3 in Austin/ 7 in Mexico) where I will need summer attire..
My first thoughts? Cut offs. They have been cool since circa 2003, I had a pair. However, I am pretty tired of these guides to summer-wear, where it is only cut offs and over sized singlets (tank tops) – fucking……hey.
Skinny girls, you think you can fashion out by cutting up some shorts and donning an over sized tank. Or perhaps cutting careful holes in a vintage t, to make it look more vintage. Want a prize for being (not that) original? Want a prize for who can spend the least on their clothes? Why not work on fashion’ing out on clothes that will work on the fatties too…
It could be that I am not actually bitter at you for suggesting the cut offs – but bitter at the cut offs for not working with my legs. When I think about this though, I feel like cut offs were high on the fashion rotation as of 2007 until last year (peaked, now – finished). This year.. Who knows – Alexa Chung probably needs to wear it, and we all follow.
Anyway – I just found this fashion’esque blog and it annoyed me greatly (not posting here, because I don’t like to hate on people – openly). Don’t vintage your pics, suggest cut offs and decide you are the fucking oracle of all that is sassy. You are a size 2, with legs for days. That wasn’t that difficult.
I’m just saying, when you suggest cut offs to every man and their dog, things get pretty ugly.
(Mind you, if I am more of a bag of bones by Tex-Mex – I’mma probably don some cut offs.. Don’t judge.)
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