ASK LUCY: I’m gluten free and breakfast sucks

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Ask Lucy !Dear Lucy

I’m bored of my weekday Früstück of corn flakes & banana.

Looking for gluten-free, eatable on work desk, affordable alternatives.

Hilfe?

Many thanks,

Hungry in Mitte

Dear Hungry in Mitte,

OK – After doing some research, there are a few things to note on being gluten free in a modern world:

  1. The internet loves quinoa for breakfast – pretty sure that is a dinner food, but I’ll let you have it.. Pinterest.
  2. Gluten free breakfasts tend to be a few things: biscuits, cakes or parfaits.
  3. Everything has oats in it – and I think that if you were the gluten free type who could eat oats, we probably wouldn’t be having this conversation – because oats are delicious.. Am I rightttt.
  4. You can get gluten free oats, but it seems that this is a bit of a roll the dice situation – and with farming of grain these days, you can’t guarantee it won’t be contaminated by the glut.
  5. Your life is the pits!

Being gluten intolerant sucks about as much as not eating animals – no offensive vegetarians/ vegans/ I’m a vegetarian but I will eat free range chicken/ I’m a vegetarian but I sometimes eat fish/ I’m a vegetarian but once a year I eat a steak because I miss it and am terribly iron deficient (idiot)

So – what a cunundrum you have yourself in here – ugh. As no question is to go unanswered – here are my suggestions, but I quietly fucking hate you for asking (no offense)

BANANA, YOGHURT, SULTANA’S AND QUINOA (summer fruit, when in summer)

I’m not going to tell you how to cook this, shits on the packet. And considering you can’t really eat very much, there is generally not that much to cook. So – cook the quinoa add all the other stuff – it’s just like museli.. I guess? The good thing about this is on a Sunday night, when you aren’t really doing much – you could just cook a couple of days worth of quinoa. So each day all you really have to do is cut up the fruit, add yoghurt – and voila, breakfast.

FRITTATA

OK – so the GENIUS thing about a frittata is that it is equally as good cold. So you just mix like a thing of eggs together, cut up some veggies (pumpkin, brocolli, beans, tomato) then in a baking dish add everything and pop in the oven on a lowish heat. My oven doesn’t have a thermometer – so I play the guessing game of “Is this hot enough?” You will find that the edges of the frittata rise, and the center stays wet – when this happens, pop tin foil over the top of the dish, and turn oven down slightly. You can eat this for days – and it’s just like eggs. EVERY.FUCKING. MORNING…..BOOM.

CELERY AND PEANUT BUTTER (I’m sorry?)

This is all we used to eat as children…for snacks. And I vaguely remember it being delicious AND super quick to make. The ideal thing about peanut butter is that it makes you feel full, I think. And you could possibly be quite skinny if you lived off this for breakfast, you’re welcome.

WHEN IN DOUBT, COFFEE. 

This is legitimately a shit idea. I’m sorry – but gluten free? Come on. I would honestly train my body to just drink coffee and only want lunch, like a really early lunch – but only lunch. And then just snack throughout the afternoon on almonds, or whatever all you health freaks get amp’ed about.

This is legimately all I have for you – maybe you could coin dinner for breakfast as a thing.. Much like I do in the reverse?

Love Lucy

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Femme of sass, sometimes.